I'd Definitely Like To See Less Twerking

I'm Covered With Loser Dust.

There Are Ten Commandments, I've Only Broken Three.

You’ve Got To Be Prepared For The Names They Are Going To Call You Compared To Your Male Peers… You Will Be A Floozy And A Slattern. He Will Be Virile And A Ladies’ Man. You Will Be A Freakshow, A Retching Wretch, A Sloppy Drunk. He Will Be Charismatic, Vainglorious, A Ferocious Drunk And Dionysian. You Will Be Indiscriminate And Desperate. He Will Be Generous, Tortured And Driven.

If You (the Press) Lie About Us, I Will Hit You, Kurt Will Shoot You, And We Both Will Sue.

If You Want To Ask About My Drug Problem, Go Ask My Big, Fat, Smart, Ten Pound Daughter, She'll Answer Any Questions You Have About It.