I Was Sitting In The Toilet And

I've Never Walked Off Stage And Said, I Shouldn't Have Done That. Because When You Do What I Do, You're Like A Fighter. You Throw The Right Hand And Say, That's What Got Me To This Dance. You Can't Have Doubt. If You Have Doubt, There's No Show.

I Never Could Tell A Joke. I Just Started Talking To The Audience, And When The Drunks Would Yell, "hey, When Do The Broads Come On?" I Got Good At Saying, "relax. Clear Your Skin Up First." They Called Me "the Insult Guy," But It's Never Mean-spirited. I'm Just Exaggerating Everything About Us And About Life.

Women Were Afraid Of Me, They Were Scared To Death. But I Always Say Be Yourself, If You're Funny Then Let Your Sense Of Humor Go There. I Mean There's No Sense Hiding What You Feel.

Frank Sinatra Enjoyed My Humor, So I Could Say Almost Anything To Him. I Mean, Within Reason.

I Have A Problem, If The Light Goes On On Tv And It Blinks Midnight, I Don't Know How To Fix It.