I Used To Drink Wine. This Girl

I Wear A Necklace, Cause I Wanna Know When I'm Upside Down.

It's Weird... People Say They're Not Like Apes. Now How Do You Explain Football Then?

People Associate Long Hair With Drug Use. I Wish People Associated Long Hair With Something Other Than Drug Use, Like An Extreme Longing For Cake. And Then Strangers Would See A Long Haired Guy And Say, "that Guy Eats Cake!" "he Is On Bundt Cake!" Mothers Saying To Their Daughters, "don't Bring The Cake Eater Over Here Anymore. He Smells Like Flour. Did You See How Excited He Got When He Found Out Your Birthday Was Fast Approaching?"

I Type A 101 Words A Minute. But It's In My Own Language.

What Am I Drinking? Nyquil On The Rocks, For When You're Feeling Sick But Sociable.