I Try To Only Eat Animals That

After You Eat A Hot Pocket, Everything Will Taste Like Rubber For A Month!

There's Something That's Really Fun About The Challenge Of Making The Mundane Funny, Too, I Think.

I've Always Wanted To Be An Actor. I've Never Planned On The Acting And The Stand-up Feeding Each Other; They've Always Been Separate Desires.

Hey, People Who Travel With Their Bed Pillow. You Look Insane.

Is There A Homeless Guy Built In To The Design Of Dunkin' Donuts? ...there'll Be An Entrance Here... A Deranged Lunatic Here.