I Thought I Had An Appetite For

Today Is The First Day Of The Rest Of Your Short, Brutish Existence As A Sentient Creature Before Being Snuffed Out Into Utter Nothingness For All Eternity.

A Woman Is Like Beer. They Look Good, They Smell Good, And You'd Step Over Your Own Mother Just To Get One!

The Entire World Of Grown-ups Is Corrupt And Stupid.

Your Cable Television Is Experiencing Difficulties. Please Do Not Panic. Resist The Temptation To Read Or Talk To Loved Ones. Do Not Attempt Sexual Relations, As Years Of Tv Radiation Have Left Your Genitals Withered And Useless.

I'm A Level 5 Vegan, I Don't Eat Anything That Casts A Shadow.