I Think That If People Are Having

"life Is Like A Sewer - What You Get Out Of It Depends On What You Put Into It." It's Always Seemed To Me That This Is Precisely The Sort Of Dynamic, Positive Thinking That We So Desperately Need Today In These Trying Times Of Crisis And Universal Brouhaha.

Things Are Much More Complicated. Feminism Versus Pornography, For Example. There Are A Lot Of Feminists Who Think It Is Bad, But Others Think It's Good. I Have Become, You Might Call It Mature - I Would Call It Senile - And I Can See Both Sides. But You Can't Write A Satirical Song With 'but On The Other Hand' In It, Or 'however'. It's Got To Be One-sided.

In My Youth There Were Words You Couldn't Say In Front Of A Girl; Now You Can't Say 'girl.'

In One Word He Told Me The Secret Of Success In Mathematics: Plagiarize; Only Be Sure Always To Call It . . . Research.

Political Satire Became Obsolete When They Awarded Henry Kissinger The Nobel Peace Prize.