I Think I Was Once Given Cocaine

David Lloyd George Had Been To Germany, And Been So Dazzled By The Führer That He Compared Him To George Washington. Hitler Was A 'born Leader', Declared The Befuddled Former British Prime Minister. He Wished That Britain Had 'a Man Of His Supreme Quality At The Head Of Affairs In Our Country Today'. This From The Hero Of The First World War! The Man Who Had Led Britain To Victory Over The Kaiser!

Ping-pong Was Invented On The Dining Tables Of England In The 19th Century, And It Was Called Wiff-waff! And There, I Think, You Have The Difference Between Us And The Rest Of The World. Other Nations, The French, Looked At A Dining Table And Saw An Opportunity To Have Dinner; We Looked At It An Saw An Opportunity To Play Wiff-waff.

I Lead A Life Of Blameless Domesticity And Always Have Done.

London Is A Fantastic Creator Of Jobs - But Many Of These Jobs Are Going To People Who Don't Originate In This Country.

I Love Tennis With A Passion. I Challenged Boris Becker To A Match Once And He Said He Was Up For It But He Never Called Back. I Bet I Could Make Him Run Around.