I Think I Have A Lot Of

I'm A Comedian, Which Is The Opposite Of A Lifestyle That Equips You To Be A Parent.

I Spend Way Too Much Time On Facebook And Myspace To Feel Too Uncomfortable At This. I Like To Think Of The Internet As An Effective Way To Waste Time And Time.

That's Why When I Send A Postcard I Quiz People. "hey, Did You Get That Postcard?" "yeah, Yeah Yeah." "well What'd I Say?" "uh, You Were Havin-" "i Was In Jail"

I Think Stand-up Comedy Is This - It's This Kind Of Indulgence And Narcissism.

I Watch A Lot Of Tv, I Drink A Lot Of Coffee, But You Know What's Really Addictive? Heroin.