I Think Extreme Sports Are Really Good

I Don't Want The Money. I Don't Want The Drama. I Just Want To Do My Show. I Want To Have Fun Again.

I Don't Do Any Jokes That Old. I Might Have Maybe One Or Two Jokes From High School That I Still Do.

There's Something About Doing Stand-up That's Cathartic.

At The Time, I Was Reading This Miles Davis Book, And He Was Talking About Coming To New York Right After He Was In High School. It Kind Of Made Me Feel Like, "yeah." I Didn't Want To Go To College; I Wanted To Do Stand-up. And I Figured, "what's The Point Of Doing Stand-up Around Dc? I'm Always Going To Be Under-appreciated There Because I Started There." I Felt Like I Was Strong Enough And Unique Enough That I Should Give It A Big Leash To Shine. New York Was The Best Thing That Ever Happened To Me As A Comedian.

I'm Dave Chappelle And I'm A Chronic Masturbator.