I Solemnly Swear That I Am Up

Professor Snape Was Forcing Them To Research Antidotes. They Took This One Seriously, As He Had Hinted That He Might Be Poisoning One Of Them Before Christmas To See If Their Antidote Worked.

I Heard From My Dear Friend Tiberius Ogden, That You Can Produce A Patronus? For A Bonus Point...? Harry Raised His Wand, Looked Directly At Umbridge, And Imagined Her Being Sacked. Expecto Patronum! The Silver Stag Erupted From The End Of His Wand And Cantered The Length Of The Hall.

Children Being Children, However, The Grotesque Hopping Pot Had Taken Hold Of Their Imaginations. The Solution Was To Jettison The Pro-muggle Moral But Keep The Warty Cauldron, So By The Middle Of The Sixteenth Century A Different Version Of The Tale Was In Wide Circulation Among Wizarding Families. In The Revised Story, The Hopping Pot Protects An Innocent Wizard From His Torch-bearing, Pitchfork-toting Neighbours By Chasing Them Away From The Wizard's Cottage, Catching Them And Swallowing Them Whole.

I'll Be In My Bedroom, Making No Noise And Pretending I'm Not There.

Oh, Shut Up Weatherby.