I Refer To Myself As Gay, But

Most Conservatives Also Believe In The Death Penalty, But Not Abortion, Which Proves They Like To Procrastinate.

I Think Comedy Is An Angry Art Form; It's An Outsider Art Form. Anger And Comedy Are Really Connected. If I'm Angry About Something I Will Try To Think About Something Funny About It To Lighten The Load Of The Anger And Cope With The Anger.

The Best Tattooists Are In San Francisco, And They're Kind Of Like My Family Now. I'm Always Excited To Come Back To San Francisco.

Sometimes The Only Way To Deal With Horrific Things In Life Is Through A Dark Sense Of Humor.

My Former Bullies Pay Extra To Come Backstage And Meet Me After Shows, And I Pretend Not To Know Them In Front Of Their Friends. It Is The Most Divine Pleasure To Exact The Revenge Of The Brutalized Child That Resides Within.