I Read Books More Than I Go

I Discovered On School Days, When They've Got To Get Up At 6:30, They Won't Get Out Of Bed. But On The Weekends, They Were Up At 6 A.m. I Was Like, "why Do You Guys Wake Up So Early On The Weekends?" It's Like, "because I Wake Up And I Think, Is It A Tv Day? And If It Is..." So We Had To Change That Rule. I'm Like, "thank You For Telling Me What I Need To Do."

I've Had A Little Bad, Bad Media Luck The New Year. Well, Apparently I'm Dating Bill Clinton, Which Makes Me Nervous. I Didn't Know, Though.

Success Is Getting Up One More Time Than You Fall Down.

How Many Times Can You Say, "no Yanking On One Another's Genitals?" Everything Is Hilarious Until Someone Starts Crying.

I Read Some Article Where Reese Witherspoon Said, "if You're Not Yelling At Your Kids, You're Not Spending Enough Time With Them." It Made Me Feel So Much Better.