I Know That I Am Essentially A

I Try To Write Parts For Women That Are As Complicated And Interesting As Women Actually Are.

I Look Out The Window And I See The Lights And The Skyline And The People On The Street Rushing Around Looking For Action, Love, And The World's Greatest Chocolate Chip Cookie, And My Heart Does A Little Dance.

Everybody Dies. There’s Nothing You Can Do About It. Whether Or Not You Eat Six Almonds A Day. Whether Or Not You Believe In God. (although There’s No Question A Belief In God Would Come In Handy. It Would Be Great To Think There’s A Plan, And That Everything Happens For A Reason. I Don’t Happen To Believe That. And Every Time One Of My Friends Says To Me, “everything Happens For A Reason,” I Would Like To Smack Her.)

Here Are Some Questions I Am Constantly Noodling Over: Do You Splurge Or Do You Hoard? Do You Live Every Day As If It's Your Last, Or Do You Save Your Money On The Chance You'll Live Twenty More Years? Is Life Too Short, Or Is It Going To Be Too Long? Do You Work As Hard As You Can, Or Do You Slow Down To Smell The Roses? And Where Do Carbohydrates Fit Into All This? Are We Really All Going To Spend Our Last Years Avoiding Bread, Especially Now That Bread In American Is So Unbelievable Delicious? And What About Chocolate?

When You Realize You Want To Spend The Rest Of Your Life With Somebody, You Want The Rest Of Your Life To Start As Soon As Possible.