I Haven't Shoplifted Since I Was 13.

Most Of The Laugh Tracks On Television Were Recorded In The Early 1950’s. These Days, Most Of The People You Hear Laughing Are Dead.

Just For The Record, The Weather Today Is Calm And Sunny, But The Air Is Full Of Bullshit.

These Days, Most Of The People You Hear Laughing Are Dead.

I Want My Whole Life Lined With A Topical Anesthetic.

I Don't Care What They Do With My Book So Long As The Flippin Check Clears.