I Have Little Belief In Human Progress.

God Must Love The Rich Or He Wouldn't Divide So Much Among So Few Of Them.

The Federal [bank Deposit] Insurance Scheme Has Worked Up To Now Simply And Solely Because There Have Been Very Few Bank Failures. The Next Time We Have A Pestilence Of Them It Will Come To Grief Quickly Enough, And If The Good Banks Escape Ruin With The Bad Ones It Will Be Only Because The Taxpayer Foots The Bill.

I'm Ombibulous. I Drink Every Known Alcoholic Drink And Enjoy Them All.

America's Biggest Failure Is Its Inability To Take Comedy Seriously.

Moral Certainty Is Always A Sign Of Cultural Inferiority. The More Uncivilized The Man, The Surer He Is That He Knows Precisely What Is Right And What Is Wrong.