I Eat Like A Caveman.

I Never Leave My House. Then I Don't Have To Put A Bra On, And I Don't Have To Change My Pants.

I Mean, If We're Regulating Cigarettes And Sex And Cuss Words, Because Of The Effect They Have On Our Younger Generation, Why Aren't We Regulating Things Like Calling People Fat?

I Have The Street Smarts And Survival Skills Of, Like, A Poodle.

I Love Photoshop More Than Anything In The World!

I Just Went To The Doctor Today, I Got A Chest X-ray Of My Lungs And Discovered That My Breasts Are Uneven.