I Don't Think I'm One Of Those

I'll Be The First To Admit It, The Life I'm Leading Is Basically A Joke. I Should Probably Be Cooler About It, But I Can't Fake It, You Know?

I Cook A Little - I've Never Taken Classes Or Anything - But Enough To Get By.

I Used To Go To The Us Open On My Birthdays And Sit In The Nosebleeds.

I Had A Very Detailed Retirement Plan, And I Feel Like I've Met Every Aspect Of It: A Lot Of Golf, A Lot Of Carbs, A Lot Of Fried Food, And Some Booze, Occasionally - I've Been Completely Committed... The Results Have Shown.

I Used To, Like, Hit For A Half Hour And Then Go Eat Cheetos The Rest Of The Day, Come Out And Drill Forehands. Now I'm Really Trying To Make It Happen, Being Professional, Really Going For It, And I Miss My Cheetos.