I Damaged My Achilles Tendon, So I

I Imagine Like Most Of Us That I'd Like Obscene Amounts Of Money But The People I Met And Worked With Who Have Those Obscene Amounts Of Money And Have Obscene Amounts Of Fame Have Awful Lives. Really. I Mean Hideously Compromised Lives. And I Can Go Anywhere. No One Knows Who I Am.

In Fact My Favourite Thing Is The Wig Because I'm A Very Lazy Actor So Every Time I Put It On, In Order To Keep It Straight, They Kept On Telling Me To Tip My Head Back Because Otherwise I Was Eating It All The Time.

I'm Still Spending My Working Life Trying To Mine People's Souls And Now They're Complimenting Me In Reviews On The Amount Of Time I Spend In The Gym. On The Definition Of My Triceps.

It Seems A Bit Weird To Call Someone Your Girlfriend When You Have A Child.

When I Came Back From Filming 'abduction', I Told My Agent: I'm Staying In London Now. If It Takes Doing Children's Theater From The Back Of A Van In Kilburn, That's Ok. I Need To Be With My Family. My Job Is To Keep The Family Together And Provide For Them.