I Can Be Drunk Until 6 In

He Smiles So Much, I Don't Think He Has A Central Nervous System.

If Somebody Tries To Tell Me The Earth Was Created In 7 Days I Take A Fossil And Say "fossil". If He Still Won't Shut Up I Throw It At Him.

I Like My Friends Because They Make Me Feel Normal, Even Though I'm Not.

If You Want To Get An Audience Quiet, Just Say "abortion" And Everybody Shuts Up And The Tension In The Room Is Spectacular.

I Like College Football, But I'm A Huge College Basketball Fan. I Could Sit And Watch Every Game Of March Madness And Be Happy. That Could Be A Vacation.