I Believe In Practicing Prudence At Least

There Are Two Kinds Of Humor. One Kind That Makes Us Chuckle About Our Foibles And Our Shared Humanity -- Like What Garrison Keillor Does. The Other Kind Holds People Up To Public Contempt And Ridicule -- That's What I Do. Satire Is Traditionally The Weapon Of The Powerless Against The Powerful. I Only Aim At The Powerful. When Satire Is Aimed At The Powerless, It Is Not Only Cruel -- It's Vulgar.

The Charm Of Ronald Reagan Is Not Just That He Kept Telling Us Screwy Things, It Was That He Believed Them All. No Wonder We Trusted Him, He Never Lied To Us. ... His Stubbornness, Even Defiance, In The Face Of Facts ('stupid Things,' He Once Called Them In A Memorable Slip) Was Nothing Short Of Splendid. ... This Is The Man Who Proved That Ignorance Is No Handicap To The Presidency.

I Believe That Ignorance Is The Root Of All Evil. And That No One Knows The Truth.

So Keep Fightin' For Freedom And Justice, Beloveds, But Don't You Forget To Have Fun Doin' It. Lord, Let Your Laughter Ring Forth. Be Outrageous, Ridicule The Fraidy-cats, Rejoice In All The Oddities That Freedom Can Produce.

I'm Sorry That Government Involves Filling Out A Lot Of Forms. ... I'm Sorry Myself That We're Not Still On The Frontier, Where We Could All Tote Guns, Shoot Anything That Moved And Spit To Our Hearts' Content. But We Live In A Diverse And Crowded Country, And With Civilization Comes Regulation.