How Many Of Those Dead Animals You

Hey Deion, Bubbelah - Maybe You'd Better Pay A Little Less Attention To Those Unfairly Draconian Salary Caps That Only Allowed You To Acquire Four Of The Five Remaining 1932 Aston Martins Still In Road-worthy Condition After You'd Paid For Life's Little Necessities Like Hookers And Weed, Get Your Medulla Oblongata Out Of Your Duodenum For A Few Milliseconds, And Make A Tackle Or Two, Okay, Babe?

The Radical Right Is So Homophobic That They're Blaming Global Warming On The Aids Quilt.

I Like The Show [factor] Because It's Horny, But It's Not Skeevy. Where Else Are You Going To Get That Nowadays?

On Thursday, A Passenger Forced His Way Into The Cockpit Of A United Airlines Flight From Miami, But Was Subdued After The Co-pilot Hit Him With A Small Ax. Good To See Our Airlines Are Being Kept Secure By The Latest In 12th Century Technology.

South African Schoolchildren Set A World Record This Week By Creating The World's Longest Clothesline. Hey, What Do South Africans Wash Their Clothes With? Apar-tide!