Here's A Man Who Was Twice Elected

Remember: What Dad Really Wants Is A Nap. Really.

Beneath Their Surface Differences, There Are A Lot Of Deep, Underlying Differences.

I Took An Estimated Two Thousand Years Of High School French, And When I Finally Got To France, I Discovered That I Didn't Know One Single Phrase That Was Actually Useful In A Real-life French Situation.

Dear Hotel People: We Don't Need A Cheeseball Clock-radio. We Need Places To Plug Stuff In. Thank You.

Never Have A Dog. Let's Not Beat Around The Bush Here: Dogs Are Morons.