He Had Been My Almost. My Might-have-been.

As If In The Other Side Of His Kiss There Could Ve A New Life

Almost Everyone In Heaven Has Someone On Earth They Watch, A Loved One, A Friend Or Even A Stranger Who Was Once Kind, Who Offered Warm Food Or A Bright Smile When One Of Us Had Needed It. And When I Wasn’t Watching I Could Hear The Others Talking To Those They Loved On Earth: Just As Fruitlessly As Me, I’m Afraid. A One-sided Card Cajoling And Coaching Of The Young, A One Way Loving And Desiring Of Their Mates, A Single-sided Card That Could Never Get Signed.

I Knew Something As I Watched: Almost Everyone Was Saying Goodbye To Me. I Was Becoming One Of The Many Little-girl-losts. They Would Go Back To Their Homes And Put Me To Rest, A Letter From The Past Never To Be Reopened Or Reread. And I Could Say Goodbye To Them, Wish Them Well, Bless Them Somehow For Their Good Thoughts. A Handshake In The Street, A Dropped Item Picked Up And Retrieved And Handed Back, Or A Friendly Wave From The Distant Window, A Nod, A Smile, A Moment When The Eyes Lock Over The Antics Of A Child.

As She Brought Prospective Buyers Through, The Realtor Said It Was An Oil Stain, But It Was Me, Seeping Out Of The Bag.

I Stared At Her Black Hair. It Was Shiny Like The Promises In Magazines.