For The First Time The People Of

Howard Dean Was Endorsed By Al Gore. Now, If Dean Could Get Gray Davis To Campaign For Him, That Would Put Him Over The Top.

Arnold Schwarzenegger Announced That He Is Going To Run For Governor On Our Program Last Night. My Staff Didn't Know, Arnold's Staff Didn't Know, I Was Shocked As Everyone Else. If He Doesn't Get Elected Governor, Maybe He Should Work For The Cia. I Mean, He Can Keep A Secret Better Than They Can.

American Taliban John Walker Lindh Has Pleaded Guilty To Two Counts Of Terrorism And Will Face Twenty Years In Prison. I Guess That Means His Jihad Is On Ji-hold.

Rumors Have Restarted That The Republican Ticket Will Not Be Bush-cheney. But Today Those Rumors Were Put To Rest When Cheney Said, 'no, I'm Keeping Him On The Ticket.'

President Obama Will Be Going To Disney World Where He'll Unveil His New Plan To Create Jobs. And What Better Place For The President To Talk About His Jobs Plan Than Fantasyland?