Folks Who Go Through The Tabloids Ought

You Know, Crankiness Is At The Essence Of All Comedy.

I Only Do A Show When There's Somebody I Want To Talk To.

Ever Noticed That No Matter What Happens In One Day, It Exactly Fits In The Newspaper?

I Am So Busy Doing Nothing... That The Idea Of Doing Anything - Which As You Know, Always Leads To Something - Cuts Into The Nothing And Then Forces Me To Have To Drop Everything.

The Peak Of Being A Fan Is A Hotdog And A Beer And A Seat At The Game. There's Nothing Above That. Nothing Above It.