Famous, Adj.: Conspicuously Miserable.

Reason, V.i. To Weight Probabilities In The Scales Of Desire.

Pocket, N. The Cradle Of Motive And The Grave Of Conscience. In Woman This Organ Is Lacking; So She Acts Without Motive, And Her Conscience, Denied Burial, Remains Ever Alive, Confessing The Sins Of Others.

Money. A Blessing That Is Of No Advantage To Us Excepting When We Part With It.

A Violin Is The Revenge Exacted By The Intestines Of A Dead Cat.

Pessimism- Philosophy Forced Upon The Convictions Of The Observer By The Disheartening Prevalence Of The Optimist With His Scarecrow Hope And His Unsightly Smile.