Don't You Hate It When...your Suitcase Is

As An Old Reporter, We Have A Few Secrets, And The First Thing Is We Try The Phone Book.

No One Likes The House Next Door To Look Worse Or A Lot Better Than His Own.

The Average Bright Young Man Who Is Drafted Hates The Whole Business Because An Army Always Tries To Eliminate The Individual Differences In Men.

Obscenities... I Think A Lot Of Dumb People Do It Because They Can't Think Of What They Want To Say And They're Frustrated. A Lot Of Smart People Do It To Pretend They Aren't Very Smart - Want To Be Just One Of The Boys.

Vegetarian: Indian Word For Lousy Hunter.