Do Your Own Thing. Speak In Your

I Don't See Teenagers Anymore. I See... I See Youths. Slumped S Shapes In Their Hoodies, All Huddled Round A Bin Of Burning Grannies. All Texting Eachother Because They've Given Up On Speech.

I Don't Mind Most Religious People, I Talk To Them. I Listen To Them, You Know, Banging On. "i Prayed Very Hard And Then The Fairy Came." "did He? Good. Have A Biscuit." I Only Get Annoyed When They Try And Make Me See The Fairy. "you Have To Let The Fairy Into Your Heart." Look, I Wouldn't Let Him Into My Garden, Okay? I'd Shoot Him On Sight, If He Existed, Which He Doesn't. Now Have Another Biccie And Be Quiet, Will You Please?

Beer Must Be Made By Food Companies. It Makes You Wander The Streets At 3 Am Looking For Things To Eat. "what's That, Is It Moving, Get It!! It's A Nun! Fry Her!! Fry Her!"

The Terror Of Failure Can Make You Feel Like A Failure. So A Bunch Of People Think You're Not Very Good At Your Thing. How Much Do You Invest In What They Say? How Much Do You Care? Failure Is Not Putting Yourself On The Line.

I've Been Writing Since I Was Very Young, Even Before I Was A Teenager. As Far As I'm Concerned, I Am A Writer - Whether My Writing's Spoken Or Written In A Blog, Paper, Book Or Printed On The Side Of A Submarine.