Delta: We Never Make The Same Mistake

Do You Remember When You Found Out There Was No Santa Claus? I Was So Upset I Didn't Think I'd Be Able To Do The Show.

New York... When Civilization Falls Apart, Remember, We Were Way Ahead Of You.

You Can Email Me, But I Prefer Letters That Come Through Conventional Mail. I Like Letters That Have Been Licked By Strangers.

President Obama's Trying To Work Out A Nuclear Deal With Iran, And The Republicans Are Steamed. They Got Together And Sent Iran A Letter About The Nuclear Deal. They Said If This Doesn't Work, By God, They're Going To Send Seth Rogen And James Franco.

Mitt Romney Is Running For President Again. That Will Be Attempt No. 3. Well, Everybody Needs A Hobby. He's Almost Certainly Running, And I'm Almost Certainly Retiring, So I Don't Care.