Definition: Connoisseur, N. A Specialist Who Knows

What Is A Democrat? One Who Believes That The Republicans Have Ruined The Country. What Is A Republican? One Who Believes That The Democrats Would Ruin The Country.

Imagination, N. A Warehouse Of Facts, With Poet And Liar In Joint Ownership.

Proboscis, N. The Rudimentary Organ Of An Elephant Which Serves Him In Place Of The Knife-and-fork That Evolution Has As Yet Denied Him. For Purposes Of Humor It Is Popularly Called A Trunk.

Pleasure, N. The Least Hateful Form Of Dejection.

Ugliness, N. A Gift Of The Gods To Certain Women, Entailing Virtue Without Humility.