Dance Of The Sugar Plum Bikey. Yes,

Its Okay I'm Wearing Really Big Knickers.

Oh No. I've Just Accidently Paid A Visit To The Cakeshop Of Love. I Haven't Put Back My Italian Cakey, But I Have Accidentally Picked Up A Dave The Tart.

I Don't Want To Be Rude To The Afflicted But Uncle Eddie Is Bald In A Way Which Is The Baldest I Have Ever Seen.

I Could Have Quite Literally Snogged Until The Cows Came Home. And When They Came Home I Would Have Shouted, "what Have You Cows Come Home For? Can't You See I'm Snogging, You Stupid Herbivores???

I Don't Know What's Going On With Mum And Dad, But It's Weird. Mum Keeps Asking Dad To Do Things And He Keeps Doing Them Unfotunately, She Hasn't Said 'hand Over Your Money And Make Your Way To Europe!