But I Always Like To Play Ugly

I'd Rather Have A Part Where You Walk Into A Room And You Leave. That's Perfect For Me.

I Don't Mind Pointing Out Some Of The Failings Of Old Age, Because We Are All Headed In That Direction, Unless Of Course We Take Our Own Lives Before We Become A Burden. I'm Not Advocating Suicide, Oh Wait, I Guess I Am.

I Just Hate The Whole Idea Of Labeling Anything As A Comedy. If You Tell Me Something's Funny, I'll Want To Rebel Against It. When I Go To A Bookstore And See Books Categorized As Humor, I Get Furious. Don't Tell Me That A Book Is Funny. Let Me Decide If It's Funny. It's The Same With Sitcoms. You Call Something A Sitcom And People Expect It To Be Funny. And That Ruins Everything.

When You Hear Someone Use The Word 'meds' Instead Of The Word 'medicine,' Chances Are They're No Stranger To Massive Doses Of Mind-altering Psychotropic Drugs. Back Out Of The Room Slowly.

When People Tell Me They Are Going To Go Scrapbooking, I Say, 'why Don't You Make It Yourself.' It's Like Chocolate-chip Cookies. People Buy The Cookie-dough Roll And Slice It, And Then They Lay It On A Cookie Sheet. That's Not Making Chocolate-chip Cookies.