But At The Same Time, I Have

For Many Weeks After [my Wife] Died, I Could Not Get Used To The Feeling Of Coldness And Lifelessness On Her Side Of The Bed - And It Was Even Worse When They Took The Body Away And Buried Her.

As I Said, I Had No Publisher For What A Carve Up! While I Was Writing It, So All We Had To Live Off Was My Wife's Money And Little Bits I Was Picking Up For Journalism.

I Was Going To Say 'my Friend Stuart', But I Suppose He's Not A Friend Any More. I Seem To Have Lost A Number Of Friends In The Last Few Years. I Don't Mean That I've Fallen Out With Them, In Any Dramatic Way. We've Just Decided Not To Stay In Touch. And That's What It's Been: A Decision, A Conscious Decision, Because It's Not Difficult To Stay In Touch With People Nowadays, There Are So Many Different Ways Of Doing It. But As You Get Older, I Think That Some Friendships Start To Feel Increasingly Redundant. You Just Find Yourself Asking, "what's The Point?" And Then You Stop.

We Say, 'shall We Meet For A Drink?', As Though Drinking Were The Main End Of The Appointment, And The Matter Of Company Only Incidental, We Are So Shy About Admitting Our Need For One Another.[...]we Say, 'would You Like To Come For Some Coffee?', As Though It Were Less Frightening To Acknowledge That We Are Heavily Dependent On Mildly Stimulating Drinks, Than To Acknowledge That We Are At All Dependent On The Companionship Of Other People.

I Like The Rain Before It Falls. Of Course There Is No Such Thing, She Said. That's Why It's My Favorite. Something Can Still Make You Happy, Can't It, Even If It Isn't Real.