Between Ron Paul And Rick Perry, I

I Kid Fox News, But They May Be A Little Biased. We Had An Earthquake Here On Monday, And They Reported That 'the Earth's Crust Was Emboldened By Obama's Weakness.'

I Was Out At The Hbo Party, These Are Liberals, I Imagine, And A Lot Of People Came Up To Me And Said, "keep Giving It To The President."

Which Is Why I'd Like To Tip Off Law Enforcement To An Even Larger Child-abusing Religious Cult. Its Leader Also Has A Compound, And This Guy Not Only Operates Outside The Bounds Of The Law, But He Used To Be A Nazi And He Wears Funny Hats. That's Right, The Pope Is Coming To America This Week And Ladies, He's Single!

I Don't Know Anyone Less Jesus Like Than Christians.

This Party Is Just Full Of Children, And Someone Needs To Leave Them In A Hot Car.