After Fifty Most Of The Bullshit Is

I Love My Dog Unconditionally, But Never The Man I'm Sleeping With.

Feminism Has Never Been Sexy, But Let Me Assure You That It Never Stopped Me From Flirting, And I Have Seldom Suffered From Lack Of Men.

My Son, The Holy Church Is On The Right, But Jesus Christ Was Always On The Left.

The Longer I Live, The More Uninformed I Feel. Only The Young Have An Explanation For Everything.

My Name Is Eva, Which Means 'life,' According To A Book Of Names My Mother Consulted. I Was Born In The Back Room Of A Shadowy House, And Grew Up Amidst Ancient Furniture, Books In Latin, And Human Mummies, But None Of Those Things Made Me Melancholy, Because I Came Into The World With A Breath Of The Jungle In My Memory.